Birthday cake hangover
We're right in the middle of birthday season again, and I find myself with a sugar hangover today. We celebrated Stepdaughter #4's 16th birthday last night with homemade brown-rice macaroni and cheese (she's a lacto-ovo vegetarian), green beans, and a salad, topped off by the cake I always bake for these occasions: butter fudge cake with fudge icing. I really pigged out on the cake.
Because I don't ordinarily allow myself products made from white flour and sugar, and because I'm a carb addict, it was an opportunity to feed my inner child's (and my candida's!) cravings and I sure did! It's interesting after you haven't had that particular kind of toxin in awhile how it seems to really pack a wallop. I was trying to have a conversation with Tony, our webmaster, today and I felt like I my head was packed with cotton. I couldn't remember something from 2 weeks ago that I thought I ought to be able to.
The last meeting of the Becoming Your Self course is tonight, and one of the things we'll be covering is "How do you sabotage your conscious relationship with your Self--where do you find ways to hold yourself at lower frequency?" and the vital importance of not getting caught up in abusing yourself further by self-punishment, etc. So, it's interesting to have presented myself with the challenge, today, of having done exactly that (done something to keep me at lower frequency and out of an awareness of being in touch with my Self).
I'm happy to report, however, that I have not beat myself up about it. I have managed to stay neutral, and I can feel my vibration rising. Heck--I loved every bite of that rich, fudgy cake, and if I now get all mad at myself for it, I'll not only lower my frequency further, I'll make myself feel horrible with guilt in a few weeks when the next birthday celebration comes and I find myself eating cake again! I have decided that if you're going to do something, do it without guilt. I'm convinced that the guilt is more damaging than the original "sin." Birthday cake is one of the great pleasures of Earth-life, of duality, and it may just be one of my last holdouts. Someday, the day will come when I find I am just not interested in it, but for now, it still holds quite an allure.
Because I don't ordinarily allow myself products made from white flour and sugar, and because I'm a carb addict, it was an opportunity to feed my inner child's (and my candida's!) cravings and I sure did! It's interesting after you haven't had that particular kind of toxin in awhile how it seems to really pack a wallop. I was trying to have a conversation with Tony, our webmaster, today and I felt like I my head was packed with cotton. I couldn't remember something from 2 weeks ago that I thought I ought to be able to.
The last meeting of the Becoming Your Self course is tonight, and one of the things we'll be covering is "How do you sabotage your conscious relationship with your Self--where do you find ways to hold yourself at lower frequency?" and the vital importance of not getting caught up in abusing yourself further by self-punishment, etc. So, it's interesting to have presented myself with the challenge, today, of having done exactly that (done something to keep me at lower frequency and out of an awareness of being in touch with my Self).
I'm happy to report, however, that I have not beat myself up about it. I have managed to stay neutral, and I can feel my vibration rising. Heck--I loved every bite of that rich, fudgy cake, and if I now get all mad at myself for it, I'll not only lower my frequency further, I'll make myself feel horrible with guilt in a few weeks when the next birthday celebration comes and I find myself eating cake again! I have decided that if you're going to do something, do it without guilt. I'm convinced that the guilt is more damaging than the original "sin." Birthday cake is one of the great pleasures of Earth-life, of duality, and it may just be one of my last holdouts. Someday, the day will come when I find I am just not interested in it, but for now, it still holds quite an allure.
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