Note to Ego: It's none of your beeswax!

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I used to feel—and very recently so—that my perspective and my message were unique and that the world was in dire need of seeing things from my vantage point. That, indeed, it was my duty to get people to see the world the way I did, given such a vision through my dramatic ascent in frequency back in 1982—the Swiss mountaintop experience—as I was. Imagine my chagrin at recognizing lately that LOTS of people seem to already know that which I felt was my core message to share! And more!

Sure—I have some details of the Big Story that are unique to me as far as I know, but the main message—the one that seemed so lacking in people's understanding before—was suddenly showing up from a multitude of sources, and not just from other teacher-types, but from all sorts of other people I interact with.

Pondering this from many angles, my ego was deflated at believing that the contribution I have felt so passionate to make is unnecessary. Why would I feel so much energy for writing and teaching if I have nothing new to offer? (This is false, by the way! You know ego—very one dimensional with a big glob of Vaseline on its lens.) And then it struck me—the reason it suddenly seems that people already see what I see and more, is that my intention for what seems like forever has been to “play with the big kids.” And, by golly, I finally am! By the Law of Attraction, I am magnetizing people into my sphere that already see higher than those that I was “playing with” for most of my life. So of course it suddenly looks like everyone already “gets” it! And that is to be celebrated, not bemoaned!

Feeling a bit adrift and with the sad feeling that maybe my contribution was superfluous, I consulted Higher Wisdom via a tarot reading last night. (I love Tarot.com .) It turned out to be the most enlightening, encouraging, supportive reading I’ve ever had. I always approach divination of any kind as being a tool for my Spirit to communicate with me, and I always affirm that I will receive that which I need to receive from it. (Sometimes, the message I receive is that it was not the right time for a reading and that I needed to pay closer attention to the energy and not use divination as a crutch!) Last night, it was clear that getting a reading was timely and appropriate as the cards had exactly the issue spelled out, and the reading “said” exactly what I needed to help me feel enfolded and inspired and in alignment with my wisdom. After studying it, I was clear that I am already riding the wave of my destiny—which, of course, is being steered from the wisest aspect of me, and no matter what my ego fears are, I can't mess up. "Relax, Julia," was a main theme of the message! (Imagine that.)

What I understand now—some from the tarot reading; mostly just from getting ego out of the way sufficiently to allow a rise in perspective—is that by following the “juice,” I will know each step on the path, and the path of worrying about it is NOT juicy! In fact, that path runs off in the ditch every time! Because I feel energized when I’m channeling Higher Wisdom and sharing it means that is what I get to do. I GET to do it—I don’t HAVE to do it—I GET to do it! It is not my duty, but my privilege. It doesn’t matter who else benefits or doesn’t benefit. And the truth is that it’s none of my business who knows what and who doesn’t know what. It’s my sacred task to simply continue to express what I am inspired to express, and let it benefit whomever it’s meant to benefit. The “Universal Administrators” will figure that part out—who the audience is and why. I do not need to—it’s not my job. My job is to follow the joy and know that as long as I’m feeling energized and joyful by sharing my perspective, I’m on track with my life and my purpose. And though much of that is not "new news," the breakthrough is that I believe my ego is finally "getting" it!

Don’t ya just love the way this game works?!

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This page contains a single entry by Julia published on November 12, 2005 9:49 PM.

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